To Discern is to see things as they REALLY are, not as you WANT them to be...

Often couples are unsure of whether or not they can remain in a committed relationship with one another. They attempt couples therapy but their hearts and souls are not entirely committed to the process ~ they are unsure if they want to do the work to restore their relationship to health. This is where Discernment Counseling comes in.

Discernment Counseling ~ what is it?

  • Precursor to Marital Therapy/Couples Counseling

  • Goal is not to solve your problems but to help you decide whether to try to solve your problems…seeing if change is possible

  • Clarity about what direction to take your marriage

  • Confidence as you move forward

  • A deeper understanding as to what happened to your marriage and what might be possible for the future


  • One to Five sessions – YOU decide each session whether to meet again

  • Sessions are 90 minutes long and cost $200

    • First 25 minutes is with you both in the room

  • 30 minutes with each of you separately (60 minutes total)

  • Back together as a trio for wrap-up

The most intensive work is in the one-on-one conversations with each of you separately; this is because each of you are in a different place and I want to help you sort out how to move forward. I commit to providing you each with empathy, respect, and compassion regardless of which direction you are leaning.

The Paths

There are three paths for a couple:

  • Path 1: Keep marriage as its been

  • Path 2: Separation or Divorce

  • Path 3: An all-out effort for 6 months with marriage therapy to see if you can build a strong marriage that is good for both of you

If you choose path 3 – you decide at the end of that time whether or not you stay married, based on what you have learned during the six months.

*If you choose path 3, marriage therapy session length will be decided upon mutually based on therapist recommendation, budget, time constraints, etc. See Rates & Insurance tab for more information*

Why I do Discernment Counseling:

A large percentage of couples enter marriage therapy unsure of what it is they want. Discernment counseling provides a safe space in which to find clarity, confidence, and understanding ~ which are integral in making ANY huge life decision…especially whether or not to end a marriage and change a family system.